My Grown-Up Christmas List

It's that time of year again when generally you often get asked what you want for Christmas. I'm not a big fan of that question for a few reasons. One being I don't want people to spend their money on me and if I do happen to have something I could ask for I always feel like it's to expensive even if it is a used book. Another reason is because what I want for Christmas can't really be found or bought at a store and for whatever reason people tend to not believe me when/if I tell them these things that are found on my grown up Christmas list. For my personal list if you was to ask me here is what I want: for you to be my friend, which I tend to make more difficult than that initially sounds. It truly is that simple of a list, I don't need any expensive gadget or whatever is the next big thing just knowing I have a friend that is there for me. Since that list never cuts it I also find it amazing how difficult a time people seem to have finding me a gift (hint: you can even try asking one more time for me to do something with you and I might surprise you and say yes this time) but seriously books I can't feel guilty when I am gifted a book whereas I can sometimes feel when I buy that book I really wanted but need, well that could be argued. You know it always amazes and makes me happy when people will see something and they say they thought of you because that means they were listening or paying attention to something you said or did (also listening could easily be added to the grown up Christmas list because we all like to feel like we're being listened to when telling a story or that secret or something that you are going through). This time of year, as I recently put in a status on my FB page, can be a difficult time of year for people. It is a time with one of, if not, the highest rates of suicides which is heartbreaking (actually so no matter what time of year this happens). If I was to make my grown-up list a bit broader and not just include me here is what it would basically be this:

 That we would have a bit more patience and understanding. Not only during this time of year but the whole year around. For you see we truly don't know what others are going through. Recently I was in a store and was talking to an employee and had asked how his day was. When he greeted me he had a smile on his face and really friendly but when he answered my question he said he was having a long day and went on to say he had a lot on his mind. Just thinking about stuff. I didn't pry as to what was going on but said something along the lines of those days are rough and I hope things get better. Was there more I could've done probably I'm not sure but I will say that at the time I wasn't even going to ask how his day was going, which is rude on my part but I felt like I needed to ask and I did. And I think that's what I'm learning is that 1) you don't ever know what battle people are facing even if they have the biggest grin and seem like they have the perfect life and 2) it's not going to take a whole lot of your time to ask how someone is doing or take a few minutes to visit them. What seems trivial to you may make the biggest difference to someone. I've had people just randomly send a text or email and say something and it made my day and really encouraged me or someone has given me a hug when I needed it and just really helped. Never, ever underestimate what a kind word or deed will mean to someone even if it's just taking the time to listen, truly listen to them.

- To me the true meaning of this season isn't about the amount of boxes with your name on it or how much was spent or what is even in the boxes. When it's all said and done and people ask how was my Christmas I don't think about the gifts I got I think about who I got to spend the time with and hopefully we made memories. I mean it sounds like a cheesy Christmas movie I realize but it's true. I'll greatly appreciate those gifts that I may receive but I'm big on it's the thought that counts. I'm just adding to the cheesy factor, huh?! It's the truth though because for someone to even think about me or see something and they say I saw this and thought of you and had to get it for you or even taking the time to write a note or whatever I appreciate it more then I probably convey. 

How the Grinch Stole Christmas is one of my favorite books and cartoons to watch this time of year and I love this line:

And the Grinch, with his Grinch feet ice cold in the snow, Stood puzzling and puzzling:
"How could it be so? It came without ribbons! It came without tags! It came without packages, boxes or bags!" He puzzled and puzzed, till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before: "Maybe Christmas," he thought, "doesn't come from a store-- Maybe Christmas--perhaps--means a little bit more."


 I guess I just want my list to include more of me taking time for others even if it's something as simple as sending a Christmas card. And not getting frustrated at the long lines in the store or at the cashier who may be having trouble because to some degree everyone we meet is going through something. So I guess in essence my Christmas list is for me and others to be more kind, more patient, more understanding, take the time to listen and don't forget everyone you meet has a story, and is going through something be it good or bad so if they tell you a story or about something that's going on share in their excitement if that's the case or offer a shoulder, kind word or something if it's a struggle they are facing. As dorky and ridiculously cheesy as it is I truly believe we meet people for a reason be it in passing or we get to be around them for a bit longer.

I suppose I should add a Christmas song but for whatever reason this song came to mind as I was typing this...