Kindness

I saw a video today that was made back in the fall of 2016 - or that's when it was originally posted on Facebook - but it was of this guy that set out to do anything nice or helpful for anyone he saw. The video showed people just ignoring him, getting away from him as fast as they could, saying no, hesitantly saying yes and questioning why he wanted to help. There was one that said to do something for the next person (pay the bus fare for that person) and one said they needed help with something but it would take longer than they had and he said no I have time. This got me thinking about some things. I have no doubt from the beginning of time to some degree there has always been that distance or hesitance when confronted with something like this but sometimes it feels like in a time where we have so many ways to be in touch with people and be there for people we are further away if that makes sense. Like we are literally beside someone or we have so many ways to contact people with that little phone in our hands yet it feels like people feel more alone and isolated now than maybe ever. I'm hesitant to write that because I don't want to get all nostalgic because that is a very, very tricky path. I don't want to glamorize the past and especially so much that I just add to the maybe not so positive things that we face today and further isolate and get to the point where I can't appreciate the good in the now. Nostalgia can be good but I don't want to focus so much on the past that I'm not in the now and I don't live and appreciate the now. But as I was watching that video I got the impression that it feels like somehow we fall in one or more of the category of wondering what the persons ulterior motive is to help us in the first place - that you aren't helping me just to help me, what do you want in return...or pride - that one can trip you up real good...or we seem to be afraid that it will make us look selfish or weak or even a bother if we ask or accept help and perhaps that's just the culture here in America - none of those are true, we're human and this life is difficult not only do we need help sometimes even it's just help carrying groceries in but we need that connection...we think we're wasting people's time, the being a bother - all of the best gifts I have ever received have been when people have taken their time and helped me by listening or helping with something. To me time is the most precious gift to give or receive. I don't think I am writing this like I want to to say what I really want to. In the video he wasn't going to be able to celebrate his friends birthday the following week so he made a little cake and went when he could go and celebrated her and her birthday early and her reaction to that was one of you could see that she was appreciative and someone in awe that someone cared and she was moved to tears. I like to think that there are more people out there that are showing these acts of kindness and it's just that the bad unfortunately gets more attention - it's not that there is more bad but it some how gets glamorized and more attention. Also not sure what that says. But it does seem like that there is a bit of a look of shock when someone has something nice done for them even if it's just holding the door open for someone. I guess if there was to be some kind of point to this is that you don't have to set out to do so many acts of random kindness to so many strangers, you don't have to have a degree, well known name or loads of money to make a difference. Some how it seems that it has even become a competition of how to up the acts of kindness - never should it be about that. There's studies that show social media has made people feel more alone and isolated than ever before. First don't ever compare your life to others - at all - but also for sure not on those few words and a snap shot. You know when I take pictures and share them the people aren't seeing all the ones I deleted and the ones that didn't turn out like I envisioned or wanted. One may be blurry, or it just didn't show the idea I had in my head like I thought it would, or another reason. Sometimes I wonder if I shouldn't post them too because though they aren't what I and many others would say is the perfect picture there is still something to be seen and learned from that picture. Same with life. Same goes for that book of how life is supposed to go that people refer to so often - which I think hinders and causes more harm than anything. Because to me that would be so boring if we all lived a life where at a certain age we graduate school, another age we get a dream job and another age get married have the 2.5 kids dream house and picket fence. That's awesome if that happens for you or you are working toward that. To be honest I think to many get lost in that and they think that's their dream and that they are a nobody if they don't have that and it's so far from the truth. You can make fun of me and I may be wrong in this but I think we all have something to offer and it's not all of the same thing, we each have something unique in some way and we all have different paths that we have walked and will walk. And part of that is so we can help each other out along the way. If we all walk the same path again that would be so boring, I hate repetition and stuff, like for me I want to see and do as much as I can there is so much out there. My path has and is different than yours and we each have something to offer and help each other along the way. I'm a firm believer you never meet or have anyone come into your life on accident and sometimes you're really fortunate to have those people that God knits into your life. And we need those passing strangers that offer to hold the door open or that stranger that paid for your coffee or just smiled and/or gave you a compliment but those are so important just like having those constant people that God knits into our lives. I'm so thankful for both. Sometimes life does get dark and lonely and you just feel crushed by the weight of the bad and you try to focus on the good but some days, oh some days you need that assurance. That one little act of kindness that sparks a light in the midst of your darkness and that little ember hits the wick to the light and it lights up the room or the path. I also like to think that those moments that someone comes to your mind and you want to call them or give them a gift or just let them know you were thinking of them, or that stranger that you feel this urge to help in whatever way, or so many other examples I think there is a reason for that and though it may seem silly to you, one should always just go with it because that just may be the thing that someone needed. You know I've had times where I just felt so alone and I thought God are you there, do I even matter and someone would send me a text or I would see someone and they gave me a hug, I had a stranger one time I was at Logan's eating by myself and was really struggling with some lies and just anxiety in general and there was a lady sitting at the table in front of me also eating by herself and I'll never see that lady again, she didn't know me but she paid for my meal that day and I'll never forget that. To me that was nothing small and I still can't believe that she did that but it meant so much. One she spent her money on me but also that for whatever reason she saw me that day and again for whatever reason decided to pay for my meal. But I've also encountered someone that just smiled and it encouraged me. They say you don't know the battle that someone you're standing next to may be going through and that is so true and I think that's why the best gift you can give someone is your time - the time to smile, ask how are you, just listen or give advice, give that shoulder to cry on. Or whatever is something that you are good at to help people cause again I think we all have some way that we are good at and best able to help. Cause there are so many different ways that the bad can attack and if we work together good wins. Good always wins and I'll believe that until I die. So don't ever get so focused on how many people you can or have helped or that you don't have the means to help. I appreciate all of the gifts and material things I have gotten from people and I may could repay them back in some way for that but I can never truly show my appreciation or pay them back for the time that they have given. There never has been or never will be a small act of kindness because showing kindness tears down walls, lifts people out of pits and helps us all take another step on our path in this life.

I love this song The One He Speaks Through by Mandisa (if you haven't yet you should definitely get the whole album Out of The Dark - it is amazing, such impactful, honest and uplifting songs). I've heard people say that when something happens to confirm or remind them of something that it's a God wink, which I love, and I love how this song makes you think what if those random moments of when someone comes to mind or you want to help that stranger or say something nice to them that what if it's God and what if that is that persons God wink.