Monday, November 28, 2016

It Ain't Over Yet

Set backs, or sit downs as I sometimes like to call them because sometimes I just get a bit overwhelmed and 'sit down.' Problem with me sitting down is I can stay there to long and there's not good company at these sit downs. Nope, not at all because fears, lies and doubts are the 'friends' at these sit downs. But you got to give it to them they sure know how to talk the talk. Make a lie sound good and if you ain't careful you're about ready to pay for that ocean front property in Arizona and forget all the truths you have known. I've found myself in a sit down moment. However, I'm getting up scooting that chair I was sitting in back under the table of lies and walking, no I'm running away. These lies, well see some people tell themselves a lie so much they'll believe it's true because it's the only way they can deal with what they did or their part in it and some people have some things happen to them and they believe the lies that they have no worth, that what happened is their fault and they build walls up and push people away. In some ways maybe we all fit in both categories. I'm not here to play the blame game because who did what and why they did what they did, well sometimes you'll never get the true answer of that and that's okay because that's not my whole story, it's not my whole puzzle. Good thing to because it's not my favorite part...hmmm, random thought but you know we all have a part of our puzzle we don't want people to see cause we think it's ugly, a part we just can't understand why it happened, we can't see how it fits. Maybe these are our most important pieces not because you deserved or it was good that you went through the struggle but 1) you made it, you survived that struggle that you thought was going to end you. 2) maybe you'll have a just so happen encounter with someone or several someones that you'll find out are going through something similar to you or have gone through it too and you can help them. And sometimes, because I don't think we fully realize sometimes the effects something we have gone through has had on us, we meet people that will help us. They may or may not have gone through a similar situation, sometimes I think you just need someone that is there to help you see the truth of who you are and help you move forward and sometimes you do need someone to say I understand or even if they don't have the perfect answer just knowing you aren't in this alone is such a huge help. I try to do things alone way to much to be honest, I hide it's what I do, not wise, like seriously please don't do that. I'll tell you why because when you hide that's when those sneaky little lies come out of hiding in the shadows. And if you're not careful you'll hide more and more until you start to believe you'll never get out of the dark that you're so far from the light (just another lie). So I don't know what you have gone through or what you're going through, or even what lies you face because of something that happened to you. I don't have a perfect solution of how to face the lies or that will make it 100% better for the rest of your life at the snap of your fingers. I am figuring some things on how to deal with it. You know I've said it countless times but I firmly believe everything happens for a reason and I think I'm slowly understanding some reasons or getting a clearer view of the truth. Because maybe the why isn't important but knowing and getting the truth of who I am is what is important. Who I am isn't all of in my name and who is in my blood line which is interesting to find out for sure. But for me what is important is knowing that I am a child of God and that He loves me and I am important to Him my imperfections, slip ups, set backs and all. Now if you believe in God and this is also a struggle for you to completely comprehend it is my sincerest prayer and hope that you and I both 100% get the truth of that. If you're still reading I would like to add that though I have no perfect no fail course to get through these things again I have to say please, please don't try to go it alone. I sincerely hope you have at least one person you can confide in and will help you (I'll listen if you don't have anyone) and of course if you have faith believe in God by all means pray too. Speaking from experience I know sometimes it's difficult to pray when the lies get to loud so again I hope you have someone you can go to and ask them to pray for/with you. I know that can be difficult to do, Lord knows I am unbelievably private, several people that know me barely have the surface story of some of my life and there's a couple that probably wish they only knew that much because somehow I have gotten just comfortable enough to let them in and I'll talk to them. As I stated earlier sometimes people lie to themselves so they can deal with what they did but sometimes we hear lies (you're unworthy, you're a terrible person for so and so to leave, God doesn't love you, you'll never get through this just give up...etc.) those lies well I am fairly convinced that those are the lies of someone that is afraid that when you realize the truth watch out because you are worthy, you are a great person that God loves and you will get through this and on the other side of the lies you're gonna fly and oh the things that you will accomplish. Lastly, I just want to share a few things I stumbled across the last couple of days that have showed up at the right time to help me get a glimpse of the lies I had started to surround myself with and that have reminded me that I don't have to ride this ride alone.  So even if it feels like it's over it's not, because you are important and are worth so very much so no matter how quiet the voice of truth may sound right now focus everything you have on that and I don't care how small a step someone may say you have taken and it won't help take that step anyway because the light and truth may be in that very next step.

God sends people into our lives for many reasons, and in many cases, it is in response to a need we have — whether it’s now, or yet to come. No relationship happens in the Kingdom of God by circumstance or without reason, whether it’s to provide friendship, help us through a season of difficulty, provide wisdom or inspire us to stand strong in our faith when we feel weak and unsure.
- from Proverbs 31 Ministries, Godly Friends, Godly Wisdom devotion

Life is full of disappointments, failures and setbacks. None of those things can permanently stop you. You have the power in you to overcome anything that life throws at you. There is nothing as powerful as a mind made up. Surround yourself with people who remind you that you matter, and support you in the ways that matter most to you. No person, situation, or circumstance can define who you are. Don't give up or stop believing that it's possible. It's not over until you win...whenever you find yourself doubting how far you can go, just remember how far you have come.  Remember everything you have faced, all the battles you have won, and all the fears you have overcome.

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