Introvert I most certainly am

I hate when I'm included in an email conversation or an actual group of people and I'm quite content standing in the background listening, voicing my thoughts in my head, when someone turns to me and says, 'What do you think?' (or some variation of that question.) My first thought is Nooooo! My invisa-shield is broken, they have spotted me! My second thought is I'm not entirely sure where the conversation is at now since I'm still on the multiple ways to phrase a possible response to the part of the conversation that was five minutes ago. So I quickly pick one of the few old faithful and short phrases that should be an appropriate response. This recently happened to me on an email conversation at work. Which, by the way, had to do with an area that I really don't like of my job anyway. Seriously it is my archvillian, it is my Lex Luthor to Superman, my Daleks to The Doctor. Every time I think I have it conquered it shows up again to annoy me in some way. Anyway, I hate that feeling of panic when you realize there is no way of getting out of saying some kind of response to a conversation when I was perfectly okay not saying anything at the moment. I mean I was still working on the perfect response! This kinda-sorta-maybe-not really has something to do with that previous paragraph but I was recently reminded how all of my life I've always had people around and/or show up that would stick up for me and pick on me (all in good fun of course cause what's life without good jokes and laughs? Boring, that's what!). For example, back in school someone was picking on me (not the just joking among friends kind) and before I had a chance to even react someone stood up for me. I'm one to avoid conflict/confrontation as long as possible, not to mistake that for weakness but I'll exhaust all other means before I bring out the conflict/confrontation card. That's beside the point, if I have one, it is mainly that I don't know why people want to take up for me but it's nice knowing I got some people that have my back, even when I don't even realize I need it. I guess God was like, poor kid is going to take the long scenic route to find her voice and place in this world I'll have to make sure to place people in her life to help her find that voice and stick up for her. I had more I intended to write about that but alas those thoughts seem to be lost and will probably only be found again while I'm driving and get lost in thought or while trying to go to sleep and suddenly to many tabs start opening up in my brain and I have to go through and close enough so I can get to sleep.

All that talk about friends suddenly got the song You've Got A Friend in Me stuck in my head so I figure why not include a video of that to end this post.